(0:00)The False Security of Control
His plan is for you to be utterly and totally dependent on him. And because we do not like that plan, we begin to create our own plan to give us a false sense of control. I think it's all about control. It's all about control. I said to folks in church that one of the reasons why we want to be very rich is because we don't want to have to go and ask God for for money. Yeah. You know, I said to the Lord that I don't want every day be disturbing you for money for my rent. and he's like, "It's okay. I asked you to ask me for daily bread." So clearly he's not offended by it, but we want that independence. And I think the only reason why we want the independence is control unfiltered.
(0:45)When Hosts Go AWOL
Hey, uh, welcome to another episode of PF Unfiltered. My name is PF. Uh, the guys are not here to do their crazy introduction, so we're going to have a mature introduction. Hi, my name is PF of PF Unfiltered. I am the lead pastor of uh New Covenant House, uh husband of one wife, father of two daughters, and I bow down to none except Jehovah, of course. Um I've got two dogs, Hugo and Archie. They wanted to be here, but uh we couldn't bring them. The production team have banned them from the studio. Why? I don't know. Um, what happened to our hosts today? They went awall. Y'all are fired. Anyway, we've got a special guest with us today, a great friend of mine, childhood friend, uh, Abola Matson of Malik Photo Fame, Emmy award winner, fashion a I don't even know how how do I describe uh, how do I describe him? In fact, just don't worry. He will describe himself. All right. Uh, please tell us who you are. How can I follow that? Um, okay. My name is Ba Abola Matson. Um, a
(2:13)Does Jesus Have a Career?
lot of most people call me Abby and I am a filmmaker. Um, and I absolutely love love what I do. I I believe that it's a calling. In fact, I believe that if Jesus was here now, he would be a director or a filmmaker of some sort. That's really very interesting. I believe if Jesus was here now, he would be a pastor. I doubt it. Really? Why? I doubt it. Because if you look at his style, he was always communicating through stories. Yeah, that's what pastors do, right? Communicate through stories. Yes. But back then, he did not have, you know, the cameras, the lights um to be able to communicate those things as effectively as he would have. That's why he he settled for pastoring. Okay. So you clearly you guys can see that uh Abby is passionate about film making and um and and narrating and telling stories and he does it with excellence. That's the the the the reason why we have him with us today. He's somebody who does excellence without a lot of fanfare, without a lot of noise, without blowing his own trumpet. He he he does an excellent excellent work. Um and I'm hoping that you know we can get some insight into um the concept of excellence but even more important than excellence the excellent one himself and how the relationship between him and God plays out in his craft. I know that there are many of us who are um doing different things at in in life, right? But we aspire to doing things excellently. I think everybody wakes up and desires to be excellent, you know, but how how do you achieve that? What is the what is the what are the benchmarks? What is the, you know, the the marker that you search for in your work that allows other people to look at it and say this is excellent.
(4:23)Defining Excellence for Yourself
For me, I would I was yesterday evening I was I was frying um I was making some pheasant and my wife started talking me up to a friend who was there about how I cook, you know, and they asked if I cook edikong and all of those things and I said I only cook what I will eat, right? If I'm not going to eat it, I will not cook it. I will not even learn how to cook it. So, so, so that's where it starts from, right? Something that I can consume for me, right, is the benchmark, right? And how I like it consumed is the benchmark, right? So, I'm kind of in a sense the the the measure. Yes. And then other people can can interpret that and call it mediocre when it comes to my, you know, my some of my cooking or excellent. But you get my point. But but the thing about it is if if you did it to the best of your ability, right? Then it's excellent. Okay. Right. Because you can you can only do the best that you can do. Okay. Which is what is required of us. Okay. Right. Um so basically you say excellence excellence is subjective. It is to to a degree. Okay. Right. Um because most human beings want to do the bare minimum. Most human beings they just want to do the bare minimum. I was I was having a conversation with my daughter that um her first year in college and she landed an internship and I said to her I said you have to do beyond just the basic stuff. You have to position yourself and come up with ideas and do things that your value to the company cannot be measured even as an intern. Even as an intern where the the expectation of you is minimal. Yes. So basically doing beyond what people expect of you way way beyond that when you leave they must miss you. Right. Right. Then if you adopt that to the point when you start working when they're trying to lay off people or they're trying to shrink or whatever it is that they're trying to do, make more money. Apologies my ring camera. Yes. You know, if if you if you're if you're if you position yourself in that way where your work is excellent, you're always doing beyond what you're asked to do, you're always creating value. When they're firing people, your name would not come up. Amen. I I I I like what you said about about the desire to create value, right? And and we'll talk about that, but but let me let me let's let's go back. Okay. Let's go back. I've known you for a long time. I I think um I've known you since 1984 [Music] 85 86 thereabouts. Maybe a little later. Um yeah, I I I think we met when you and my brother were in school together. I met your older brother. So actually a little later, maybe 89 thereabouts. Um and and way back then I I remember you were quiet. You guys used to hang out. I used to look at all these you know all these young boys. You know my my brother would try and take my car you know when I didn't want him to have it and stuff like that. So you guys were like you know not quite nuisances but you know your nuisance but borderline nuisances right but but this is the question right? Did you did you feel back then that you were a creative person? Fantastic question. Um, back then, right? Um, and back then you were like what? 12, 13, 14. Yes. 12, 13, 14. Um,
(8:34)The Shame of Being a 'Creative'
that kind of thing was frowned upon. Yeah. Right. um because of our upbringing and not just the upbringing the the colonizers did not teach us the importance of art. They understood art. They knew the importance of art and celebrated art. But we were trained to be employees, right? civil servants. That was the mindset. That was the training. So if you know if you were not aspiring to be a doctor, right, a lawyer, an accountant, engineer and an engineer, architect, [Music] architect, those are big five. Big four. Big five. Architect. Yeah. Um, you know, cuz I mean back then the the buildings were very very vanilla. So, you know I mean you Yeah. Yeah. Not creativity was not something that we we we we our society was not big on creativity. No, it wasn't. The creative people were usually the considered artisans, right? Less than. Yes. And nobody wanted their children. Even the even the the the names right um we are from the Euroba tribe so you you photographer no it's not not photographer um oluyah oluyah basically irresponsible just irresponsible because if you Google or oluya it would be irresponsible that would come up first before the description What's the It was an insult. Yes. Somebody said, "Look at you." Yes. And those kind of other abuses come come you know come forth after. So to answer your question back in the day just wanted to you know um get an education and and see what So you wanted to be an engineer or doctor or lawyer? No, I did not even think about any of those things. Really? Just wanted to get an education. Really? Yes. You had no plan. No. [Laughter] Yes. You know, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, back up. So, so wait, wait, wait. I know at some point you came to the States. Yes. Right. You're saying basically, right, you were interested in pursuing an education, but you had no idea what the end of what the end goal was. No, I I I didn't. Okay. So So So that's really interesting to me because when I think about that, right, it kind of mirrors our walk with God. Many times we're told many times that we should have a vision, right, for our lives, you know, have a plan. Where are you going to be in the next 10 years or 20 years and all of those things? And a
(11:44)Why 'Finding Purpose' Can Be Toxic
lot of people end up getting frustrated because they don't have a vision, right? in the sense that they don't know oh I'm going to be an engineer a lawyer or a pastor or this or that even in our in our walk with God right and let me give you tell you a story when I got saved um Miles Monroe had preached this message on purpose and it was the big thing in Christianom what is your purpose in life right and basically it was a paraphrasing of what your calling is and we all would you know we got really into that message about purpose and calling. And I would go away and fast and pray, you know, for days. I'd go to the redemption camp and lock myself up in some buginfested room. I kid you not, the bugs at redemption camp were bigger than dogs sometimes. And God didn't say anything to me, right? So I I always felt a little inadequate in the sense of I didn't know what my purpose was. I knew I had a calling to ministry, but I didn't know what the end goal was. So, if there's anybody who's watching this and you're thinking to yourself, right, I don't know what the end goal is. I just know that I want to do this or this or this, right? That's not bad. I mean, you turned out great. No, it it it's you know what the interesting thing is? Um when you say that you you have a plan, it's a joke. Tell me about it. Because think about it like who leaves the house and says, "Oh, this is a good day to die." No, nobody. They had a plan. They had a plan to return to the house. Yeah. But they never did.
(13:31)Man's Plan vs. God's Sovereignty
Yeah. Many are the thoughts of a man's heart, but only the council of the Lord will prevail. You see what I'm saying? So the the plan that you have that is not crowned by him. It's a joke. That does not recognize his sovereignty, that does not recognize his his the way that he works, right? Because I think many times, right, we we forget the idea that God is here a little, there a little, line upon line, precept upon precept. God is as you follow me I reveal more to you and then you can look back on your life and you see a beautiful tapestry but in the moment right many times you do not really know the fullness of it Abraham had no when Abraham left his father's house he was looking for a child right Abraham was 75 years old when he's when God said leave your father's house right and go to a land I will show you not to this land to a land I will show you right at 75 he didn't have a child, right? He didn't have a child. And I think that must have been a motivation for his hunger for a god, for God, because the gods that he lived with, that he grew up with, the gods of his fathers could not give him a child. So, he was looking for an alternative God at 75. And that god said to him, "Follow me. I will show you something. What? Just follow me." Right? And it seems like that's what you did, right? just I want an education. What I'm going to do with it, I don't know where it's going to take me. I don't know. Yeah. And off you went. Yes. Um, you know, even even David, you know, King David, the Bible says that it dawned on him that he was king. It was not It was not the plan. No, it wasn't at the end of his 5year plan. It it it dawned on him that he was king. Like a lot of us, it dawned I mean when you were living Nigeria, right? The kind of life that you're living now. Yeah. It was beyond your dreams. I couldn't imagine it. I I couldn't imagine being here. And most people would testify to that. Right. So then where was the plan? Yeah. Yeah. But but you know I I think the challenge we have is that without a plan many of us feel unm you know we feel a drift. A plan kind of gives us a sense of security you know like okay I'm working towards this even though in the back of my mind I know that it may not work out like that right but that thing that I'm working towards right it gives you this sense of of control. Yeah. which which is so it it lets you know that that wasn't God's original plan in the first place, right? Because his plan is for you to be utterly and totally dependent on him. And because we do not like that plan, Yeah. we begin to create our own plan. Yeah. To give us a false sense of control. I think it's all about control. Yeah. It's all about control. I I I said to folks in church that one of the reasons why we want to be very rich is because we we don't want to have to go and ask God for for money. Yeah. I I you know I said to the Lord that I don't want every day I be disturbing you for money for my rent. And it's okay. I asked you to ask me for daily bread. So clearly he's not offended by it. But we want that independence. And I think the only reason why we want the independence is is is control. Right. So back to telling us about your your days, your your ally alairo days. So so how did you end up in America? I know some of that story. It's a very interesting story. I'd like you to share some of it. Okay.
(17:33)Losing Mom: A Story of Brokenness
So I was not even interested in America to start with. Um I went to to England right after high school and something Was it after you stay in high school? No, I did. We just graduated. Okay. That's when I That's when I left. So my mom my mom was So the plan was for me to go see my mom cuz she lived she lived there. Okay. Um she was um you know how Nigerian families are. She was diagnosed with cancer. We did not know. They did not tell us the kid. It was just that mom is away. Okay. When is mom coming back? She's going to be back in a few months. A few months has come and gone. What is going on? She's staying a little while longer, right? Um so that all these nice things that you want, she can she can bring them for you. Crazy. But anyways, so the plan was to go see her after high school, but right while I was writing my exam, she passed. I remember, you know, and that was devastating. That was one of the hardest um hardest losses that I've that I've had to go through. Um, in fact, you know, I believe that something broke in me that day that is still broken till now because even with my wife and children, there's a hard posture and position that I have that I can't love you guys too much because I cannot deal with this this kind of heartbreak ever again. But a story for another Yeah. another time. So I um I'd gone to England and did not like it there at all because I believe that the system was designed to make you think small and I had a huge issue with that you know then you know yeah we're going to make Nigeria great again. So, so you came back to Los? I came back to Lagos. Um, got into college and I did not realize how much time had gone because the person I was dating then, who is my wife now, um, she would come back every year, right? And this year, you know, she was like, "Oh, I graduate." So, this was in December. She's like, "I graduate in May." I'm like, "Ah, graduates? How?" Because I was in college, right? After every semester, they would add another 6 months because there was strike. So, I did not realize how much time had passed. Yeah. Because with I mean, in the everybody, we all go through it together. Yeah. So, crazy days, man. I was like, "Oh my goodness, you're graduating." and I'm like, "Ah, I can't stay in this country again." That this this was it. So, I started making moves and um that's how I ended up here in the States. Wow. Awesome. Yeah. You know, losing your mom, I think that that might have been the time we met. I I'm I'm thinking is is that when we met? Cuz I remember when you when you guys lost your mom. Um I remember how difficult it was for your brother Deiji cuz I was closer to Deji at the time. Yes. And it was really really rough. No, it was it was was really really hard. I had never loved anything or anyone like that. You know, you know, you know, it's interesting that we're saying this this morning. I was telling you I was telling you earlier on about um clearing out stuff in my in my house. So, my my uh my younger brother had some of his stuff in in in my guest room and I was, you know, arranging them and I saw an album um and I and I opened the the album um and it was the pictures from my mother's funeral um which I couldn't attend and I can't describe how I felt seeing the casket in the in the grave. I I I I literally broke down and that's like this morning. But that's we're talking how many years ago? About 11 12 years ago. Yeah. It was it was heartending. Yeah. I was so happy there was nobody at home because when I saw it and I knew what I was looking at, I started way. Yeah. I I I know that I know that feeling very well. In fact, the night that we won the Emmys, it was bittersweet for me, of course, cuz when everybody had gone to bed, I started weeping. Yeah. you know, because um my mom was the one that saw beyond um the you see because if in you know for a lot of you that don't know much about growing up in Nigeria and Nigeria, if you're not um if you're not good in academics, yeah, you are and all the other kind of names, you know, but my mom could so be. So the first time I ever got an A was when I came to the states because all the while I thought, you know, there was something wrong based on the teaching style. Uh the the teaching style in Nigeria is focused on memorization. Yes. Not analytical skills. You don't have to you don't have to know the just just memorize it. And I've always had a poor memory always. So for me, it was always a struggle. I was one of those kids who if I study 2 weeks before an exam, I failed the exam because if I I would have forgotten everything I read. So I have to read a few hours before the exam. So everything is still fresh and just and just and it was all memorization. It wasn't understanding. It wasn't creativity. It wasn't analytical. It was memorizing formulas. memorizing and it has to be the teacher's notes. Yes. And you can't give him your own take on it. Has to be the exact exact word. Yeah. Yeah. You know, so and I had a I had a problem with that. Yeah. Um but your mom was the one person who saw through all of that. She said, you are a very brilliant person. I'm thinking to myself, me, you know, all the test results are not saying that. So when I got the first A here and then the second, in fact, I wrote an essay that they had to move me up a a a class and I'm thinking to myself like me double promotion, yes, you know, no GBT, then there's no Google, then you had to write the thing yourself. You had to do yourself, man. You had to do it yourself. You have to do the the research yourself. You have to sit down in libraries and go through books. Quick quick question. What was the first creative project you worked on? First creative project. Um, so you know before I started before I started film I started I I started with photography right and I was um I was a fashion photographer. Um, and it was someone that I knew that um, okay, so my uncle had a camera that I was messing with um, when I came to the States. Um, and every time that I, you know, then you take the photos and it Yeah. You take it to Walgreens or CVS. Yes. Some of you guys don't know that that these things were not automatic. No, they're not. You know, so you take it to Walgreens and every time I took it there, there was a particular person there that was like, I'm always excited to see what else you shoot. Mhm. You know, um that your pictures are really, really good. You do you do this for a living? I was like, no, I did not even think that was an option. And he's like, you know, you should. You have you have an eye. did not know what that I mean all of us get I know like you know so um then I put a portfolio together and went to one of the colleges to present just to see one of the teachers to have a conversation and the guy said to me he's like you know a lot of us know the technicalities of the cameras and light and this you have a natural eye for composition and how to bring out beauty out of things. You should pursue this. Mhm. And that's where my journey started. You know, it's interesting when I met you when when Okay. So, we we knew each other way back in in in the day. And then in 2009, we moved my family moved to Dallas. Yes. And we reconnected then. Yes. And I remember that I saw some pictures you had taken of a dance class, some dancers. And I remember looking at those pictures. I say, "Ah, this bola Wait, wait, wait. You take these pictures. It It looked like like otherworldly cuz you captured these ballerinas like in mid flight, you know, doing and I was like, how did this guy take this picture, you know, it's it was amazing. And then I, you know, you took some pictures for my family. Yes. Yes. And can I be honest with you, we used those pictures for like almost until I became too fat that there was no there was no way for those pictures to be to be a credible representation of of of of me anymore. But that that that's a very interesting thing. You know, I was talking to a friend yesterday and we're talking about gift. So you basically when you started taking photographs, right, you weren't thinking about this is monetiz you can monetize this. It was something you just enjoyed doing. In fact, let me let me let me backtrack. There was prayer that I prayed cuz I was asking God. I was like, "So, did you just create me empty?" Like no gifts like none. No singing, no nothing not seeing. So you can't sing? Not really. Ah really I they sing fire. If I start singing now, the angels will the angels will there will be a rebellion in heaven. Like why would you give him those kind of gifts? Anyway, let's not talk about me. That's that's you know. So it was that that I remember that prayer. Um and I discovered photography. I did not know that it was something that I had. Just a discovery. So, you didn't get a dream, my son. Pick up that camera. Camera? No, I did not. I have gifted you with the eyes of a photographer. No, I did not get that. Really? So, it was just you saw a camera. You said a prayer that you' forgotten? Yes, I had forgotten about the prayer. I saw a camera, picked it up, and took photographs. Interesting. Were you Were you working? Do you have a a secular job? Um, no. I I didn't. I was I was in college. Okay. um when that happened and after the meeting with the professor I started a business and you've done quite well because you live off it. We we're grateful to God for his mercies. Another thing about uh Bola is that he's also very humble. He's he's God has been good. God is good. Yeah. Talking about God, right? Um let's talk about God. How does your relationship with God impact your work, right? This forget that it's it's creative, right? It's work because you start off the thing with work with creative work is that you start off, oh, I enjoy my work. I enjoy my work, right? I'm really enjoying this. I'm really enjoying this. And there's, you know, it's therapeutic. It's is all of these things. And then it becomes physical work. Yeah. True. Right. How does God play in that? Excellent question. So, let me um my friend I my friend Ty Bellow, right? One of the best photographers I've ever seen. Mhm. Um I remember when because then I transitioned from photography to video and she saw one of my videos. I believe it was a wedding. Mhm. and she started crying and I'm like what is what are going on? She says I see God in your work. That's I I I think that is the greatest compliment I've ever gotten about work before. you know um because you know you you're asking about God and the work um so for let's let's use wedding for instance my desire when I create a wedding film is that when the storms of life show up which they always do as a pastor you know is that that film becomes an anchor for them to remember the reason why they got married. They started this journey in the first place. Right. Um constantly I'm constantly praying for my couples. Um even the ones that you know so I think for me is more than it's more like a ministry than just work. Um, which I mean of course you you you meet some interesting people out. Oh, people. How do you deal with that though? One of the things that I found out with um with with with people, right? Is like you talked about how earlier you talk about how people want to put in minimum effort, but people also want to pay minimum for the best. Yeah. They they're constantly trying to get everything for nothing. Yeah. Irrespective of how it impacts it impacts you, right? Irrespective of how, you know, it's like a pastor, right? Yeah. I I spend a lot of time pastoring. I spend all my time pastoring. I don't have a social life. My social life is pastoring, right? I I you know you you hang out with at church people's events their naming ceremonies their weddings their funerals their birthdays all on the premise oh come and pray for us of course pastor can you can you yes and then you go there and ah you want to leave after 5 minutes and now I perfected the art of living I I leave oh no because if you go for a wedding so first of all you do a wedding oh and by the way anyway we'll talk about this another you go for a wedding and the wedding on the invite is 4:00. You as the pastor, you know, man of integrity, you get there at what did I say time? 4:00. You get there at at 3:30 with an expectation that, you know, people will keep their word. Wedding does not start until 7 and they expect you to be okay. And not complain and not frown. No frown. And and in all fairness and all honesty, giving Fei credit, 99.99% of the time, I don't wear what I'm feeling on my face because just like you, I want this to be a memorable day. And I don't want it to be marked. I don't want you to be when you think about it of how the cursing cursing your pastor was cursing at you. Right. And then and then from the wedding, right? So we we wedding starts 3 hours late and I've had like two or three of this happen. Most of them is about 30 minutes 45 minutes kind of lateness. I've not done a wedding that was on time. On time producer, did I do your wedding? Was it on time? I wasn't know I did your wedding and then you now so think about my day and then I'm expected to sit at the reception. Heck no. I have to preach the next Sunday, but that's my life. And then somebody says, "Why? Why are they paying the pastor?" Like, like really? Why? They should go he should go and get a job. Where will I have time to do a job? Like seriously, where is the time to do another job when I'm sitting down 3 hours in a little room sitting on a banquet chair and sometimes they don't even know to give you water? Yeah. How am I going to do another job? Anyway, that's another conversation. No, but but it but it's it's it's a it's a it's a good conversation because they they have scriptural reference for it. Yes. Yes. That Paul was a tent maker because Paul was not doing sitting out 3 hours waiting for you to come show up at your wedding. No, he wasn't he was a traveling minister. Yeah. He wasn't a pastor. No, he wasn't pastoring any apart from a few a handful of Yeah. guys. And and and people were sending money to him by the way. Yeah. Remember Philippians 4 from verse 178. We always talk about 4:19. My God shall supply all my needs according to his riches in glory. But we don't remember the Bible. He says you ministered to me. So that prayer was a prayer of gratitude that he was praying for the people who had been a blessing to him. But once it is a modern day pastor, they say can't you be like selective selective memory. Um and I mean you know if since we we've gone on this tangent right imagine um Elijah in 2025 the hunger for kill that guy going to a woman's house house a a widow a widow with her son and their last meal and she says to him this is all we have. Yes. How insane. Not that not that he did not know because they told him. Yeah. They told him this, "We're just going to eat this thing and die." And his response, "Oh my god, make my own first." First, what an irresponsible. No, just just I mean, imagine the the the bloggers. Just think about that video online on on Tik Tok. H on. It would Tik Tok viral viral. I mean it would go viral on every platform. Oh my Jesus. Can you imagine what kind it would be the basis of the construction? Yes. Everybody will talk about that. How how does how does a Christian Yes. So insensitive. So in so so callous, so abusive, exploiter. Yes. See yourselves. And what happened? The the woman brought the food and as a consequence of that, the Lord blessed her. I am not apologizing for what I'm saying because that is what the Bible teaches us. When you are a blessing to others, God will bless you. And the fact that a person is a pastor does not preclude them from being blessed by you. Right? We focus on you. Do you know how many what percentage of churches in America are mega churches? It is less than 1% yes very true of churches that are mega churches. But everybody talks about pastors as if every pastor pastors a mega church. The average church in America is less than 100 people. Very true. So, but we we we we expect that pastor of 10, 15, 20 people to have the income of a pastor of 25 30,000 people, right? And that is the standard with which we deal with all pastors, even the ones who can barely um um um um keep clothes on their backs. Right. But I guess that's that's the cross, right? It's just it's just interesting to me how um how people have no regard for spiritual things. Yeah. I can I be honest with you? I think people are inherently self-centered and they will create whatever argument they need to create to continue to be self-centered. So, if I have to point to the excess of some guy I don't know, right, whose story I don't know, but I saw a 10-second thing on Tik Tok about him and his mansions. If I have to use that story to justify my selfishness towards you who are ministering to me on a daily basis, I will use it. So then the question is, are you really born again? I'm I I'm born again, but the devil is deceitful. My heart is deceitful. My heart deceives me and hides behind rational and logic. But ultimately, right, what our heart tries to do is preserve is self-preservation, right? That hunger for self-preservation that becomes a selflessness that that that becomes a selfishness or self-centeredness, right? is the work that the Holy Spirit is doing in us to change. Right? But many folks, right, resist that work because they do not read the Bible and juxtapose who they are, the way they think, the way they live with the word of God. So they are born again, but they're not beholding Christ. Right? There is no mirror for them to display. And when I say there is none, it's not that there is none. It's that they choose not to behold Christ. Because if you behold Christ, you are able to see yourself as you are. And the Holy Spirit can then work on you. But if every time you are confronted with a situation, there is no opposing view from a Christ's perspective. Then you you think you're fine. When the Holy Spirit speaks, it's just the voice of irresponsibility. So again, if by the fruits you shall know them, Mhm. and the fruits that we're seeing is not different from somebody that is not born again. We we we we have a word that we use to justify things that are contrary to scripture. We say wisdom. say wisdom right say you know you you know you know you know bola you have to be wise you know you can't just be irresponsible you know um you have to leave a legacy an inheritance for your children's children so I have basically with the combination of scripture and the excesses of the pastor in Atlanta justified very strongly my own self-centeredness my own instinct for self-preservation, I have shut down the work of the Holy Spirit, right? But I I sleep well because you know when Isaiah when King Uzziah died, he said in the year that Uzziah died, I I saw the Lord. He was high and lifted up and his train filled this temple. And he says, "Lo, I am a man of unclean lips and I dwell amongst a people of unclean lips." So it was not until he saw the Lord that he realized that he was a man of unclean lips because he was dwelling amongst the people of unclean lips. He didn't realize that his own lips were unclean. It is the same thing with this generation, right? Sit down on social media, you know, as well as I do. There is such a corruption of truth masquerading as truth. There is such a a travesty travesty of error on social media that is clothed with a veneer of truth. And the Bible talks about people with itchy ears who lay up for themselves teachers, right? And people laugh at Christians and say, "Oh, you know, you guys, you prosperity, gospel, prosperity, gospel, you know, and it's it's it's a derogatory term, you know, materialism and all of that." and I have issues with it. But there's another side of it, right? I call it the the uncristian Christians. the the Christians who have excised love and charity out of the faith work, who deal with God and the people of God from a self-preservative rationality, but they don't realize that they've taken the Holy Spirit out of the conversation and now they are driven by forces that even they themselves do not realize is the antichrist. Because if Christ is love and you are living a life that is consistent with love that is not consistent with love is as far from love as the east is from the west and you disguise it with nationalism you disguise it with legalism right it is antichrist it is against love when you have to come out and say preaching love is manipulative right that if you preach love you're trying to manip manipulate me. Yeah. Can you imagine? Right. Can Can I tell you something that the spirit of God told me um within the past week? Um he said that spirits are unreasonable. Yeah. So when you're dealing when when you're talking to someone that is beginning to sound unreasonable, you're not talking to a man anymore. You're talking to the spirit that is powering the man. Man, a lot of people are talking under the influence of that spirit. And for me, can I really be honest with you? I know this is kind of like a deviation from our original conversation. It's scary to me how Christians Christians who love the Lord, right? who tongue speaking churchgoing maxi skirt wearing they won't buy hair from China cuz of you know demonic spirits are mean no love and when I say and this thing you said makes so much sense that when you're talking to them and you're pointing out love the speed with which they rebut that yeah you're not you're not talking to a human being anymore. How can you speak against love? The Bible says God is love. How can you call love anything but love? How can you look a sc isn't your conscience pricked that you're living and you're you're taking positions that you know that's that scripture that story about how Jesus Christ says um you gave your body to be burned but you do not have love right it when he said depart from me ye that walk in iniquity and they're like what do We do say when I when I was hungry, you didn't feed me. You didn't feed me. When I was naked, you did not clothe me. Clothe me. When I was um uh when I didn't have shelter, you didn't house me. When I was in prison, you didn't visit me. Right? How How doesn't that send chills down anybody's spine? Like, like for real, for real, how do you Okay, well, I don't want to be a fool. I don't want to be a mumu. I don't want anybody take advantage of me. How what can anybody take from you? What? What in what way can anybody take from you that could be worth risking? Hell. Hell. No, let's just say what say it as it is. like like like seriously if you if you take advantage of me so I can lose material things and I can lose um from an egotistic perspective my my pride might be bruised that ah right you know right or or ah the guy they chopped my money that is that's the max yeah what does it profit a man if he gains the whole God and loses his soul. What earthly kingdom are we fighting for that is worth hearing? Depart from me, ye that walk iniquity, I never knew you. You said that you you you were spot on. It is the spirit of the antichrist that is speaking. Yes. Right. Which puts you in a very dangerous place. Yes. Because it means that there is a possibility. Yeah. that she wouldn't make heaven. Yeah, it's a strong possibility. That that is a strong possibility. You know, I I I don't know how any other person thinks about these things. But the things that I ponder. Yeah. And I know that they're real. Yeah. But I mean, unless you think, you know, cuz there's a school of thoughts that believes that when you die here, that's that's it. Maybe you come back if you don't do well, you come back as a cockroach or you come back as if you do really well, come back as um dog, right? You know, but um yeah, that's that's interest. It was just, you know, when when when the spirit of God told me that, it blew my mind. Yeah. And I'm sure in your work, right, you're going to come across a lot of unreasonable people. Oh, yeah. people who will make demands. How do you how do you cope with that? Um I just smile and and I'm like, okay, this is I can do this or I can't do this, you know? Um there's no you don't you don't have to hire us. There are other options, but we know what we bring. Right. Right. Um there hasn't been a wedding that we've done that um okay there's one that I'm praying for now um for the food of the womb you know those things become my business right so the question is who else you know which other vendor do you have on your team that that is praying um that you know that is standing in gap to yeah and even if they are praying you are praying you are praying and you bring something to that place of prayer yes right you bring your relationship with God you bring your knowledge of God I I I think the the the the lesson for me in what you have just said right is the is that idea that you know the value that you bring yes right apart from apart from the nice work right right and and that's that's that's the thing you didn't talk about you didn't talk about you didn't talk about how listen I know that I am an Emmy award-winning filmmaker right doing your wedding I'm going to charge you what I'm going to charge you said I know what I bring I am praying for you yes right your value is not even in the work is in your God yes you find your value in God absolutely right and and that's that's so powerful to me right that when the there are two potential places to find value, right? Value from universally acclaimed work, right? Those Emmys, they don't give them out to just anybody. I would have collected one, you know, I saw it one when I was in uh went to LA. They were selling them, but I knew that it wasn't the real one cuz I could have bought it, but even I knew it was not the real one. And you have the real one. One of my friends was telling me that it cuz I was telling him about we're talking about you know the podcast and he was like he got an award for something something production. I said where is it from one um um J award that you award anyway you could easily lean on your secular accomplishments to find value but instead you lean on God. The the Emmy is only part of the journey. It's not the destination. There you go. Right. But but we have a system or we have a tendency, sorry, not a system, to seek value not in our standing with God but in our secular standing, right? And so the folks who do not have Emmys, right, or who do not have accomplishments that are nationally, internationally, even community recognized accomplishments do not see value in their standing with God. Right? And for me, that's profound. If there's anything that I will leave here with, it is that idea that at this level that you are operating on, right? You've been all over the world, right? doing weddings, you you know, you've done this thing, right? That for some people that is the pinnacle of their career, right? You've made money. But ultimately, even in a setting like this, you're still talking about my ability to pray for you, to stand in the gap for you, right? That says you find your value in your God. Absolutely. Not in your work, in your God. Absolutely. Can you imagine? Meanwhile guy, people who never accomplish Jack right will present the work as the basis of value not the their god right. So for me I am learning as a human being to find value not in my accomplishments, not in my title or my position, not in my material acquisitions, even not in my relationships with human beings, but with God. You know, there's a scripture that says that a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions, right? Our value does not consist in the abundance of what we own and what we've accomplished. Because when you when you die, you don't take anything at the gates. That's a problem because if if they are doing emates some of us, they'll be like, "Guy, you don't even have you have a let my people go college degree." No, but but what I'm even trying to say is I have decided M to focus on the things that are eternal right they have eternal value yes things that have eternal value and the highest of that is Jehovah and the relationship with him you know and that is the same thing I'm teaching my kids I'm I'm I'm like I have to be like Abraham God said that I know that Abraham would bring up this children a certain way. You know, I I read the story of Eli, right? I read the story of Eli. The thing shook me to my bones. That man lost everything. Yeah. Because he did not train his children. Yeah. Absolutely. That's why that's why they raised up some it in fact the things that God said shook me. He said that I'm going to strip this thing from your lineage. Yeah. He said that you would in fact is what will help me carry it. He said you will not find a you will not find compassion. You you will not find a helper. You not find a helper. You not find someone to feel sorry for you. Can that is a great curse. Yeah. Yeah. And it was because of the excesses of his kids that he did not he did not he did nothing about it's it's you know you know one thing that I am learning as as um and I wish I knew this younger even as a young pastor my value comes from God. Yes. Absolutely. Right. And if I can connect with that as the basis of my value then I can communicate that to my children. Right. I can lead my family in a way that has eternal consequence, in a way that has eternal value. Right? Cuz the challenge is this year, we're raised to see ourselves through our accomplishments, right? We're raised to see ourselves through the things that we've acquired. So you have people who are who are saying, "I am worthless. What am I doing on this planet?" Based off of Yeah. How much money do I have? How much money do I have the potential to make? How much um how many people do I know? What are my connections? What am I, you know, what are my anticidence? Who who is my father? Who you know we we we look at all of these things and we a portion to each one a certain amount of value. And the more of this and this and this I have, the more valuable I see myself as. Right? And the less or less of this I have, the less valuable I see myself as. And the problem with that is this. None of those things count in the eyes of God. Absolutely. And it is him you're going to stand in front of. Who your greatgrandfather was does not matter. If your great-grandfather was not somebody who was able to influence you to have eternal value, yeah, you meet him in hell. There you go. And that's the unfortunate reality. If your father was a person of standing but did not impart to you the importance of an eternal value, eternity perspective. It's it's a problem. Nobody cares in heaven. Nobody cares. Nobody cares how big your house is. Nobody cares, you know, in this life you care. But there's a care that goes beyond just comfort. There's a care that goes beyond I want to be comfortable. I know come this life to suffer. There's a care that that says this is my life. This job is my life. This car is my life. This house is my life. These children are my life. And then you qu and they put you in the ground. They put your body in the ground. But you stand before your maker without children, without marriage, without money, without possessions, without anything that you thought was valuable. Yes. I mean, I drive a Honda Accord from 201 I don't know, maybe 2011. Yeah. Um, now my wife has been saying, "Oh, you need to change the car." And I I don't care. Yeah. like what your thoughts, what you think about it makes zero. You know, I I drive a I drive a much nicer car than he does. I drive a much nicer car than he does. But I'll just say something to that. When you when I got my car, I drive an electric car. I I I didn't understand what you were saying. Now I I I drive the car. doesn't drive me. It is is not it is not a motivation a motivator for anything in my life. Yeah. Keeping it replacing it. I don't even Sometimes people say, "Oh, so PF, what car do you want?" I say, "Well, if they do this, if they do that, I'll get this." But my mind, I have not sat down and created a plan to get a better car, a newer car, or another car. There are things that are way more important. Yeah. Way more important. You know, and I think if we can all do an audit of what we have and everybody, you know, I've learned something in the last actually in the last two weeks about the way the human mind works and I think the devil has his fingers in that pie. But we create permission structures to justify our self-preservative instinct. An exorcist. Yes. Yes. Exorcist. We we create ration and the devil will give us a lot of evidence to back up to support that thing. But the reality is the truth is always there. The Bible says that uh the word of God is sharper than a two-edged sword, dividing aunder between soul and spirit. So you can tell through the word what is of your flesh. Yeah. And what is of your spirit, what is of the spirit, but we ignore it. And my god, there are so many things that we're doing right with our children, with our marriages, with our money that are just dangerous and we don't even know it because we have this permission structure that the devil has rubber stamped, the world has rubber stamped, the church has rubber stamped. Mhm. And the Holy Spirit is like, m Where is this going to take you? Let me So so so so I I think we we had this conversation when I started um that when I you know um fasting and praying right 30 days then 60 then it was 90. Yeah it's about a few hundred days now. Now we are over 400. It's it started on your birthday actually right? Um last two years ago. Last year. Was last year. Last year. Yeah. You know, and so what God has been doing is that he'll drop thoughts like the one I just shared about. Unreasonable before. Yes. I'd never heard it before. Yeah. You know it. But when he says it, I know. Yeah. That is him. So I had a thought about people you know this um ritualist that make you rich right and scoffed and the spirit of God says never do that again I'm like what do you mean he's like the currency that matters they have plenty of it the currency of the souls of men because men would bring their soul in exchange of paper money I said but demand lives in the bush. He said that he doesn't want to be corrupted by people is the reason why he lives in the bush. That when he calls out in the realm of the spirit, he has problem answered. That blew my mind. That's deep. That's deep. You know, the Bible says, "He who seeks to be wealthy falls into many diverse and foolish temptations and is pierced with many sorrows." Right? There is a there's a path that seems right unto men, but the end of it is destruction. And what saddens me is that even the elect, right, have been deceived. Oh yes. And we're being deceived. So you know um Jesus said something. He said you can't serve two masters. Yeah. He said you can't serve mmon. Yeah. And God. It's interesting that he did not say the devil. True. Actually that's true. He did say that. No he did not say the devil. So in the realm of the spirit mmon is superior to the devil. Okay. Right. Because it was Jesus that was saying this. It was somebody else who say God was he was comparing God with mammon. Yes. Okay. Because mmon has the power to hold you in a way that nothing else does. So in fact he said he he he went further and he said that that he would love one and despise the other. That was Judas's issue. Yeah. Judas despised Jesus. Yeah. How do I know this? When that woman put the oil, it was so he was so disgusted. He was like like what what's going on? What kind of waste is this? But to come back to the point that you're making the power of Money is I mean look around you. That's what everybody's working for. Yeah. Yeah. Right. the reason why you won't come to church and you know and sometimes it's okay if you cannot make church right but if it's a consistent thing because they know that you worship this thing on Sundays you cannot be but you know they they they've gotten really good at hiding oh yes absolutely it's no longer so so it doesn't it is not um presented as money anymore no no where If it's if it's a paycheck then I will not you know I'm I'm above that. They create an acceptable reason very acceptable reason that nobody will open their mouth and say I know this is bad. No no no you should not do this on Sundays. You should not allow your children think Sundays are not important. Right? because that it is packaged in such a way that everybody has to be quiet and not say anything right but the ultimate result of it yeah is that your Christianity cuz there's some people who are in that place and who are powering through in their faith they're making sure that there are alternative avenues to connect you know to fellowship to be in the word to be in place of worship. But a lot of people, what happens is that once they miss that regular check-in, right, they get cooler and cooler and cooler. They drift further and further and further apart. Like a frog in the pot. Like a frog in the pot being gently boiled. But it's not Mammon. It's not Mammon. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Mammon knows that when you see Mammon, you run. So he hides behind a veneer of acceptability. He gives it a reason. Yeah. Yeah. He creates a permission structure. Absolutely. But ultimately at the root of it is money. Yes, it is. Either you making money, the children making money, the family making money, somebody's making money somewhere. And it's it's it's interesting. I I hadn't thought about it like that. You cannot worship God and and and Mmon. I I've always been aware of the scripture and of course I've read it but I never thought about why you cannot worship God and Satan. You cannot worship God and Lucifer. So you cannot worship God and Norman. Interesting. Very very interesting. I guess with that we have to close. We I didn't I mean the producers are going to be mad at me. They had a ton of questions they wanted me to ask you. Well, you know, we we we'll we'll we'll set up another another conversation, but he prayed. He said that we should talk about only the things that Exactly. Now, you pray. So, we did, you know, we did as led by the Holy Spirit. And this was a great conversation. Thank you so much for coming. Thank you. We had I've had I've I've been enlightened, you know. I'm going to go and meditate on this and dig a little deeper into into this these things we talked about. But um I I I hope you guys you know were blessed. Um they always tell us to um follow, subscribe and share where Oh yes and also where do they find um Matters from Malik Photos? Where can people find you? On Instagram at Malik M A L E K F O T O Weddings. That's M A L E K F O T O. And I just said Malik. Malik. Malik. Don't be annoyed. It's the night. No. No. So, so Malik um is a Hebrew name and it's an Arabic name as well. I see. So the the in in Arabic is called Malik. Okay. In Hebrew is called Malik. Okay. Malik means king or chosen one. It's interesting. I grew up in a Muslim. Well, not my mom was Muslim. My father was a Catholic and it was Malik. It was Malik. So, Malik uh photo weddings right on Malik Photo Wedding on on Instagram. So, please, you know, check out the work. I promise you, you you'll be shocked at the the level of excellence that he brings to this to this um to this genre, to this work. It's amazing. Amazing. Thank you so much, my brother. Thank you so much. God bless you and and take you to to greater heights in Jesus name. All right, guys. Like, subscribe, share. Yeah. See you next week. Bye bye. [Music] Unfiltered. [Music]